Rev. Shakes
Apr 062012
Apr 052012
Dec 192011
Here’s a flyer I made for Hollowdog’s New Year’s Eve gig at Macadam’s.
Believe it or not, a lot of thought went into this piece that you see before you. So, it’s New Year’s Eve and I wanted to portray a change – a transformation old to new. The carpet on the top is, of course, the carpet from Overlook Hotel and the bottom is the photo of Jack the eternal Caretaker.
I think it came together quite nicely.
You better watch out, you better not cry, you better not pout, I’m telling you why. Santa Claus is coming to town… Really? I don’t think so. I’m coming to town with a big, red bag of reality.
When my wife and I first had to discuss the delicate issue of accepting or rejecting the idea of Santa Claus for and with our son, we were at odds. Me, the dismissive skeptic vs. my wife, the ‘standard,’ American X-mas traditionalist.
I know some kids flip out when they find out Santa’s not real, but I have no tolerance for nonsense. Sure, I like the holidays: the get-togethers, the exchanging of gifts, pretty Christmas lights, cozying up with the family under a toasty blanket and watching Frosty the Snowman with a cup of marshmallow-full cocoa and some tasty Chex mix—all that fun, festive jazz. But I don’t go for the elaborate hoax that is Santa Claus.
My wife was for perpetrating the saga, just by default. Her argument was that it’s what everyone does, it’s ‘tradition,’ everyone his age is going to believe it and it’ll be weird if he doesn’t – and besides it’s fun. Makes sense…until you consider what’s actually involved in keeping this crazy myth alive.
My argument is that it’s just weird and pointless. Such a ruse. It’s not easy to pull off and it is definitely not fun. You have to build a web of lies that circle the main lie. Simply explaining why you see this half-ass doppelganger everywhere you go is near impossible. He’s a skinny, grumpy, short Santa over here, then he’s a fat, friendly, tall Santa over here. And the milk and cookies? The whole chimney-delivery system? That’s just taking things way too far. ‘Playing dumb’ is something I have a hard time doing—especially when I know the kid’s going find out eventually anyway. That only serves to ruin my standing as a smart, rational, sane man. What else is my kid going to think I don’t know if, as an adult, I can’t figure out that this clown with a beard and a hat is merely a caricature of an outdated concept?
Read the rest of Truth vs. Tradition: The Santa Question – by Rev. Shakes Spear at Baby Shower For Guys
Dec 102011
One of the many things that makes the Howard Stern Show so endlessly fascinating is the incredible musical guests he’s had in the studio over the years. When you hear that a musician or band is coming in—whether you like them or not—you know you’re in for something unique and, likely, by the time the guest has finished, you’ll be a fan or at least you’ll have a new-found respect for them.
Stern has the uncanny ability to bring out the very best of nearly all of his guests, and musicians are no exception. Maybe it’s the ‘frustrated musician’ that lives inside him that makes him really appreciate musicians for their skills and abilities? Howard often talks about his lack of musicality and his inability to create something moving and beautiful—and the envy he has for those that can. He understands the time, dedication and discipline that musicians go through to create their art.
Sometimes Howard will reminisce about his early life and the impact music had on him and the shaping of his world view. When he tells Leslie West that he used to smoke pot in his room while listening to Mountain, or he tells Paul McCartney what the Beatles’ “Blackbird” meant to him as a young man growing up in a black community, how it moved him, you can feel the emotional connection. When Stern meets one of his childhood musical idols, he really is in awe. It’s refreshing to hear him get giddy and fawn over them like anyone else would, and the majority of his guests have a mutual admiration for Howard and they tend to give just a little bit more of themselves than they might in another setting.
Although a lot of people like music, it’s Howard’s true appreciation sets him apart from most other talk shows hosts. Howard isn’t necessarily looking to hear the latest hit. He seems far more interested in the motivation or inspiration behind the latest hit; what sparked the original idea, who the song is really about, where it was written, how long it took to compose, etc. The long-format interview gives him the chance to dig a lot further than, say, a Letterman or the eternally-shitty, cut-and-paste Leno ever could. Hell, Leno seems completely devoid of any insightful knowledge of his guests and he would never take the time or trouble to ask a musician (or anyone for that matter) an interesting or relevant question. Maybe NPR can offer an equally-long, in-depth interview, but it could never come close the delivering anything as entertaining, spontaneous and engaging as Howard.
Read the rest at Baby Shower for Guys – Howard Stern: Music Fan
In the December issue of GQ magazine, Man of the Year and expectant father, Jay-Z reflects on his childhood and the relationship he had with his dad. The rap mogul brings up a couple of thought-provoking points on what really matters to a child, and whether it’s better to have a dad for a while or not at all.
When Jay-Z was 11-years old, his father left him and the family. He claims, “If your dad died before you were born, yeah, it hurts—but it’s not like you had a connection with something that was real. Not to say it’s any better—but to have that connection and then have it ripped away was, like, the worst.”
Regarding the eternal struggle of trying to find a balance between providing for your family and spending quality time Jay-Z offers, “Providing – that’s not love. Being there – that’s more important.”
I’d question the real differences between the amount of pain a kid goes through with the loss of a known parent and the amount suffered by a child who never knows either one or both of their parents. I happen to be somewhere in between these poor choices and I tend to think that having a father in your life – if only for a brief time – is far better than never knowing your father at all.
My dad was gone before my first birthday and he was always just a peripheral figure. He really had no important place in my life, nor did he seem to want one. I would see him maybe once or twice a year, usually for one of the ‘big two’ holidays, Thanksgiving and Christmas and occasionally the end of summer, school shopping experience– which consisted of a trip to the mall, getting about $200 worth of clothes, having an awkward lunch and then back home to wonder when I might see him again.
Read the rest at Baby Shower For Guys
http://babyshowerforguys.com/home/content/article?id=52
Nov 122011
Check out the logo, stickers and lovely website freshly designed for the Soapmakers.
Check out this site I designed for the Soapmakers – theSoapmakers.net.
Oct 222011
Oct 182011
Oct 042011
Oct 022011
This is the perfect way to wish someone well while telling them that you don’t think they’re very bright, kind or good. It’s polite and rude all in one simple statement.
With this design you can show some hippie love along with some hateful sarcasm.
How many times have you run across a stupid motherfucker? I seem to find at least a couple a day – but that’s just me. See, I kind of prefer people to be decent citizens of their community, but those people are becoming a rarity.
If you’re like me – and I pray to all things holy that you are not (it’s exhausting being this aware of and angry at your world) – you’ll want one of the many things that I have emblazoned with this sweet design. Get yourself a shirt, a keychain, button, or maybe a set of stickers. You know you want to. Don’t be afraid.
Get your “Have a Nice Day, You Stupid Motherfucker!” stuff today and make a bunch of new friends tomorrow!
Six words to sum up my view on just about everything.
I hate the idea of anyone attempting to make decisions regarding my personal being – and I hate the idea of the government imposing ‘morality’ or ‘ethics’ onto a society at large.
Sure, you can take this as a pro-choice, abortion rights stance, but it also works on any level of intrusion by anybody. You want Rick Perry injecting your kids with the HPV vaccine? Do you like the government approving ‘official’ drugs but denying your personal ‘unofficial’ choices? Do you think your sexual practices should be branded ‘legal’ or ‘illegal’? How about those social retards that want to govern who you fall in love with?
This is an excellent design for anyone who’s sick and tired of having someone else’s view of right and wrong being imposed upon them.
It’s funny that the Tea Party claims they “want the government outta our lives!” – yet at the same time they would never let ‘homos and faggots’ get married because it’s against ‘God’s Laws.’ Oh, your grandma’s sick, in misery and being ravaged by an insidious disease and she wants desperately to end her life with dignity and pride when and where she chooses? Nope. These kind of decisions are best left to bureaucrats with religious agendas. They want to make their own decisions when it comes to being cheap-skates and not paying their taxes, and keep their kids stupid with shitty schools and their air filthy with the dismantling of the EPA, but if YOU want to smoke some dope and put your cock in ‘ungodly’ places – well, then they want to govern your ass right into prison. Fucking hypocrites.
Anyway, here are some cool My Body. My Choice. Fuck You. products that carry a terse, direct message that makes it abundantly clear that you are the person in control of your body, your being, your life.
Sure, you want to be friendly and polite, but you’re deal with a total asshole.
How to you reconcile this awkward scenario? Simple: wear a nice, polite ‘Hello, Asshole!’ shirt from Rev. Shakes to make your point clear.
Nobody likes unfriendliness – except raging assholes who don’t really seem to give a fuck at all.
Well, now with this fantastic design you can solve the problem of being nice to someone who doesn’t deserve it.
Get your Hello, Asshole Shirts, Hats and Buttons now. You’ll be glad you did – and the asshole won’t care either way.
Got a big package? Want to pretend you do? Then this is for you.
You don’t have to be a fireman to carry a fire hose, you just need a big…ego. Get your ‘Fire Hose’ gear and impress those classy ladies who need your emergency services.
Yeah, there are some women’s shirts, too, but maybe you’re a tranny or you have a huge clit and you want everyone to know it. I’ve got you covered, don’t worry about it.
As far as the baby stuff…well, baby boys do tend to pee a lot and anyone’s who’s ever changed a diaper and been soaked with an unexpected stream of urine will totally relate and find this onesie totally appropriate.
The lovely tie is pretty cool, too, because you can wear it quite discreetly at work and then when you hit the bar you can unbutton your jacket and advertise the goods to the foxes that are looking for action. If nothing else, you’ll at least get some chicks to look at your crotch and wonder.
Get some Fire Hose gear today and give the world a fair warning of the power you’re packing downstairs.
Sep 072011
by Rev. Shakes Spear
“Ladies and gentlemen I don’t want to get weird on this so please take it for what it’s worth,” said America’s Kookiest Televangelist, Pat Robertson, when referring to the earthquake that shook Washington, DC last week, “but it seems to me the Washington Monument is a symbol of America’s power, it has been the symbol of our great nation, we look at that monument and say this is one nation under God. Now there’s a crack in it. Is that a sign from the Lord? Is that something that has significance or is it just result of an earthquake? You judge, but I just want to bring that to your attention.”
Well, thanks Pat. Let me take that under consideration for a…oh, wait. Here comes Michele Bachmann with her take on what the all-loving Creator was talking about , “I don’t know how much God has to do to get the attention of the politicians,” the migraine-ridden Politivangelist mused. “We’ve had an earthquake; we’ve had a hurricane. He said, ‘Are you going to start listening to me here?’ Listen to the American people because the American people are roaring right now. They know government is on a morbid obesity diet and we’ve got to rein in the spending.” Hmmmm….
So, it’s pretty obvious that God is really, super-duper trying to get our attention and give us a message – and he’s going to use death and destruction to spread it. But what is that message?
According to Pat, the Washington monument is a symbol of a ‘nation under God,’ but he doesn’t seem to understand that giant, stone obelisks have historically been an altar of heathen worship. Apparently, he’s never come across the fact that obelisks are phallic symbols related to the worship of the Egyptian Sun god, Ra. Nor does seem to know that each side of the Washington Monument’s base measure 55.5 feet long, which add up the very Satanic total of 666 inches. The height of the obelisk is 555.5 feet, which is equal to 6,666 inches – and that, my friends, is an extra Satanic number. And, of course, Mr. Robertson can’t possibly know that Washington, DC’s entire geographic layout is based on Masonic symbology.
I would think that a man who has spent his life presumably studying religion, spirituality, Satan, cults and the like would have at some point discovered what everybody knows: Masonry is regarded by all Christ-based religions as absolutely Anti-Christ. In fact, the Roman Catholic Church’s stance on Masonry decries, “Those who knowingly embrace such [Masonic] principles are committing serious sin.” But poor Pat is obliviously unaware of the meaning behind his beloved Mighty White Penis of Power.
If he did understand it’s meaning, one would assume that Pat Roberstson would read the cracking of the Washington Monument entirely differently. He should be happy, thrilled even, that God has had enough of the sun and phallic-worshipping, power-hungry, political prostitutes that are destroying our country on the false premise of a nation under God. Shouldn’t this be a sign for Pat that God is sick of the greed and lust of supposed ‘family values’ politicians that strive to put money and business before people and Country – the politicians that he has been promoting for the last 30 years? Or does he secretly know and fully understand – and thus fear – that God is telling Pat and other pseudo-religious, fear-mongering leaders that their corruption is slowly being exposed for what it is: the work of Evil. The breaking of ‘America’s Cock’ is indeed a symbol, but not the one that Pat Robertson would have you believe.
As for Migraine Michelle…well, her interpretation is clearly a sign that God is a Republican and he does NOT like black men (especially Democratic ones) in power. She knows what the always-politically-involved God was telling us by wreaking havoc and mayhem upon the people. Not you. You’re too dumb to figure it out. Just shut up and leave it to a real Christian to explain God’s mysteries.
It’s strange that Michele Bachmann is the true seer of God’s wrath – and that she has determined that His message is somehow political. Quite fortunately for her, the Big Man just so happens to be on HER side. Coincidental? I don’t think so. It’s abundantly clear that God’s causing of earthquakes and hurricanes directly correlates to the Barack Obama administration’s gross overspending on useless domestic social programs. Duh. God doesn’t want people to have health care, an education, clean air, food, shelter, clothing, water or any of those non-essential things that foster human life. God says, “Pull yourself up by your own bootstraps, you lazy bastards. Look at me. I did it!” And Michele agrees.
It’s pretty clear that as a Christian and official interpreter for God, she understands that when Jesus said to “clothe the poor and feed the hungry,” what He meant was “clothe the poorly-dressed rich people and feed the power-hungry rich people.” Matthew 6:24 states “No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will hold to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and Money.” Wrong again, God. Michele Bachmann CAN do both and still call herself a Good Christian. That’s the true beauty of a hypocrite.
By Bachmann’s reasoning, these messages from Our Heavenly Father have NOTHING to do with Global Warming, greenhouse gasses, fracking, offshore drilling, nuclear power plants exploding and burning into the core of the planet, strip mining, unrestrained burning of fossil fuels, deforestation or any other of those so-called ‘facts’ made up by tree-huggin’, Communist/Marxist/Maoist, dope smokin’ hippies. Nope. Gods message was ALL about government spending. Plain and simple. Any fool can see that. And the fool that sees that best is Michele Bachmann.
So, with this new information from God, it’s divinely obvious that we, the roaring people, should elect Michele Bachmann to the Presidency of the United States of America. She will cut government spending (and win the war on terror and lower gas prices) and then God will be all cool, laid back and friendly with us again. I think it’s safe to say that if Michele Bachmann gets into prime political power, we can expect clear, blue skies and balmy days and nights from now until the end of time – which won’t be far off with a paranoid, homo-hating, Muslim-fearing, radical, fundamentalist Christian with her finger on the button…waiting for the next message from God.
Aug 232011
Here’s an old review I just ran across. It’s for one of my favorite bands, Pistola. Enjoy…
Pistola, Hold for Bliss
Goddamn. Pistola will kick your fucking ass. It’s that simple. Believe it. Know it…Trust me.
A beautiful display of raw passion. A tornado of frenetic, chaotic energy from start to finish. You will not hear a more intense, sincere, display of unrelenting drama…maybe ever – or until you see them live.
Propelled by intricate drumming and volcanic bass throbbings that hammer a violent threat – a tribal warning preparing you for the oncoming assault: guitars that build, heave, crash and slice like waves of grenades and glass. And the voice – that voice! A gutteral howl with the power of hell – a thunderstorm being sucked through the devil’s megaphone and amplified right into your psyche like a fist to your third eye.
Imagine sitting up in the sleeper of an old beat-up semi-truck on a cross-country trip in the middle of the night on a long, lonely road to nowhere with PJ Harvey at the wheel and Perry Farrell and Johnette Napalitano riding shotgun having a loud, drunken, dark, sexually-charged intellectual conversation about childhood trauma that quickly turns into crazy argument over why nobody thought to stop for more cigarettes, while Jesus Lizard & K’s Choice play really loudly in the trailer with a unrelenting vengeance, pushing the converstaion to a it’s screaming peak until PJ says, ‘fuck it!’ and drives the whole rig right off a cliff. That’s kinda what Pistola feels like. A viscously-sweet, daring assault on your dark emotions.
Beautiful. Intense. Pure.
Patricia Gradin is the epitome of a raw, passionate singer. Bar none. Rock, country, folk, opera? Fuck you – this beatiful voice covers it all with the kind of power you only wish your rock diva’s/falsetto operatic metal-heads had. Uncomprimised. Focused. Honest. She’s coming at you with all the force of a fist-fight and the rage of a revolution.
By the grace of all things good, she’s accompanied by a band of incredible musicians that understand and complement her so perfectly that you’d think that maybe something got right with music again…and it has. With George Podolak working magic on the guitars, Alan Dooley pummelling the bass and Randy Satarsky beating the fuck out of the drums, this band absolutely proves that bold, uncomprommising music with integrity and intensity still exists.
Seamlessly-produced by Pistola and Joel Hamilton (Unsane, Frank Black, Ani DiFranco), you’ll find yourself jonesin’ for more ‘Bliss’ right away. At first, the overwhelming power knocks you down and then while you’re staggering to your feet the lyrics start kicking in. Again, knocking you flat on your ass. The lyrics come at you slow, but after repeated listenings you’re fairly well convinced that this chick ain’t fucking around and you really want to hear what she has to say. A voice that mounts and grows and explodes. From Tori Amos whispers to a Grand Ole Opry twangs, she’s all over the place while fitting the song perfectcly at all times. Again, nothing but beautiful, graceful energy.
The recent singles ‘Drive’ and ’3 AM’ have been hitting the radio lately. If you haven’t heard these incredible songs, then call your local radio station and demand them now.
Make no mistake Pistola is gonna shoot your soul so full of holes, you may never recover.
For more information on the band, sample songs and upcoming shows visit: www.pistola.us
Aug 232011
Interview – Patricia Gradin of Pistola
by Rev. Shakes Spear
With the release of their phenomenal debut EP, Hold for Bliss, NYC’s Pistola carved a jagged, little niche: a hypnotic, thunderous thrill-ride of sound & fury racing toward oblivion. Imagine equal parts Jane’s Addiction, PJ Harvey and a bare-knuckle fistfight – that’ll give you just a hint of the raw beauty that washes over you with each listen of Bliss.
Co-founded in 2002 by vocalist Patricia Gradin and guitarist/sound-sculptor George Podolak, Pistola includes the ocean-size rhythm section of bassist Alan Dooley and drummer Randy Satarsky. Currently, Pistola is enjoying growing popularity with their live shows and the singles ‘Til 3 A.M.’ and ‘Drive’.
I got the privilege of interviewing Patricia Gradin about the band and what moves her to create such incredible sounds.
Rev. Shakes Spear: Pistola recently played the CMJ Music Marathon. How’d it go?
Patricia Gradin: Our showcase was great, no doubt one of the best shows we’ve had so far! We played Saturday night, which was the last night of the marathon, and we had an incredible crowd. People in the audience seemed to have rubbed on some kind of “CMJ” energy that allowed them to really lose themselves in the music, which is a lot to say about NYC audiences. Now, as far as the CMJ marathon itself, those things are surrounded by so much hype, that sometimes it’s hard to differentiate between reality and fiction! Don’t get me wrong, there were a lot of good shows going on, and I was happy to discover a few new artists that I really liked, but at times, it felt like people were trying to out-do each other by showing off all their music knowledge and connections. It was weird, funny, and fun. I guess you just have to be careful not to get caught up in the game and really keep focused on your music.
RSS: Your voice is incredibly powerful and the music so mesmerizing, but your lyrics are just as captivating. Tell me about your lyrical intent.
PG: Lyrics are very important to me. That’s not to say that you need words of literary proportions to have a good song. A good melody is priceless and doesn’t need words! Personally, I write lyrics that capture pieces of my own reality. It’s easier for me to sing about things I know and how they affect me than to sing about a given subject and at the end of the song give the listener some kind of generic advice. I don’t like to preach, that’s not me. I sort through a lot of my emotions by writing lyrics, and once that’s done, I move on and no longer focus on the who and why. That’s why I think it’s cool when people take a song that they like and sing along with it, thinking that the words are about this or that, when really it has nothing to do with what the writer intended to say, and that’s ok because music can be a very personal experience. I don’t necessarily want to be overly explicit about what I write every single time. I’m a little selfish about music, and most certainly about my lyrics.
RSS: You and George were in a band for a while that disbanded in ‘99 and then you got together again to form Pistola. What changed in the interim that caused the lush, volcanic chemistry that resulted in Hold for Bliss?
PG: Well, basically we both took time off from music for a while and, ironically, that’s one of the best things that happened to us. During that time we realized that music was not an optional matter for us. We learned that whether we are in a band or not, we are probably going to be making music for most of our lives in one capacity or another. It’s just something we have to do. So when George and I re-connected a few years after that, we both had grown a lot personally and musically. We were much more focused and determined. Our plan was not to have any specific agenda regarding the music. That was a key factor because that allowed us to experiment and have fun and really enjoy the process again. We weren’t concerned about proving a point or meeting someone else’s expectations. We were basically writing all these new songs for ourselves. Most of those songs, by the way, became Hold for Bliss.
RSS: So much of Pistola’s music comes across as a challenging, threatening provocation. Is there a philosophical agenda you’re trying to push with your music?
PG: Well, I like to push buttons and provoke reactions. However, that doesn’t mean that that is something we all do as a band. On the other hand, if the music we make has some sort of effect on the listener, I can only take that as a sign of accomplishment and maturity gained at our craft.
RSS: Your music is very dramatic & explosive. What do you do to relax?
PG: I sing in a band.
RSS: Have you had the chance to write any new songs?
PG: George and I are working on new music all the time. Aside from our rehearsals with the rest of the band, we try to have writing sessions every week just to keep us in that “forward” mode. Right now, half our live set is all new material.
RSS: Are there plans for a full-length album anytime soon?
PG: YES! No specifics yet, but sometime next year!
RSS: My final question: what can save the world?
PG: Millions of portable personal mirrors attached to people’s minds and all major arteries so we can all take a good look at ourselves.
Aug 112011
Here’s a nifty, little flyer promoting another local show at Pop Culture. Love him or hate him, Reagan looks pretty bad-ass…
Aug 112011
Here’s cool logo and a gritty bio I’ve created for a local, Vancouver trio. Enjoy…
From amongst the hidden hills of Mount Sapo, three Good Workmen emerged. Their faces covered in ash, their boots caked in animal fat, their hands…their hands still dripping with blood. The Soapmakers had arrived. The Village was grateful for the arrival of the ‘Three Who Cleanse Us All’. But this year was different. This year the Soapmakers broke tradition.
After 15 years of hearing only the steady rhythm of their working tools, occasionally accompanied by the screams of unwilling sheep, the Soapmakers have broken their vows of silence. For the first time the Soapmakers spoke. Slowly and softly they explained that they have been called to ‘Cleanse the World’. They would move down from the Mount and into the World to spread the knowledge and wisdom of their ancient Craft.
Determined to continue their Mission to ‘Cleanse the Souls of People and Free the Heart of Man,’ the Soapmakers deliver an earthly mix of heavy, steady rhythms with the cries and chants of a celebratory, sacrificial night.
The Soapmakers are here. Prepare yourselves. You have been warned.
Aug 012011
Jul 082011
Jun 232011
Apr 122011
Mar 172011
Oct 292010
Sep 102010
My entry for the Filmed By Bike Film Festival promotional flyer.
I don’t know what the winning submission looks like yet, but it’s probably something not nearly as classy as this piece of beauty. For more info on the Filmed By Bike fest, check out filmedbybike.org
Sep 102010
Ok, I don’t really get why this flyer didn’t go over, but then again, I have no taste. I thought it was a pretty cool design overall, but what do I know…?
Aug 202010
I created this wonderful flyer in celebration of ‘Elvis Week,’ just for the fun of it. I researched and found the traditional Elvis font and did my best to replicate here. I think it turned out nicely. I hope you do, too. Enjoy…
Aug 112010
Aug 092010
Jul 212010
Jun 062010
How could you not love this? Is it just me, or is this one bad-ass design? I worked for days on this, trying to replicate the way old-school Easy Rider posters. I searched through thousands of fonts and hundreds of pictures – not to mention the hours smoothing out his god-awful pokey knees and making his crotch nice and crispy – to put this together and the good boys of Hollowdog couldn’t get behind it. So be it. RIP Dennis Hopper….
Apr 292010
Apr 152010
Mar 292010
